So lots of changes at work and I'm back on the road a bit. My first trip in some time took me to Cleveland to visit my new clients. Not only did I get to go to Cleveland, I got to go with my boss- Yay!
Just a quick overnighter this time, and since we were running very similar schedules we shared a car. So when the fine people at Hertz provided me a Grand Marquis, I knew I had entered a slightly lower ring of hell.
The Grand Marquis is the cheapest "luxury" car I know. It's a shit pile. This turd had 16k on the clock and stuff was literally falling off on the inside. The gold on beige color combo was moderately attractive for 1984, and this is the only car I can think of off the top of my head with a front bench seat any more. Needless to say I loved every minute of it. The only upside that I can think of is the engine. It actually has some decent horsepower...although with the weight of the car makes it feel only average. This did not stop me from flogging it about however, much to my bosses dismay. The power steering pump was designed by Lou Ferrigno, so one fingered steering is no problem at all. I think I completed approximately 87 Uturns during my trip, of which a maximum 20 were legal. The only bit of fun this car offers is to slow to a creep, stick your index finger under a steering wheel spoke, make four or five swirls in the direction of your choice, and when you are pointing in the opposite direction stab the throttle and let the wheel go slack. You can repeat this until you are bored...which is approximately 3 times.
Now on to Cleveland. I didn't see much of the city, and since I had never been there before I let the client pick the restaurant. Predictably, they chose a steak house. As we were heading out, they asked if we knew how to get there and of course provided directions. I was highly disturbed when they said "It's in the Radisson. You can see it from the freeway.". A steak house in the Radisson? Let me check and see if there is any room in the next lowest ring of hell.
No Vacancy. In fact, since hell was fully booked they offered me an upgrade somewhere in Heaven's economy plus section. Hyde Park doesn't look like much from the outside, but as soon as you open the door you know they mean business. The staff was very attentive and knowledgeable, and the offerings were more than satisfying. Most of the steaks were as big as your head, and even the baby portions were plenty for the normal appetite. With all the steak preparations named for Cleveland atheletes, you get to order by using cool phrases like "Steak Lebron". Sides are family style, and they will let you order just starches and will only give you minimal crap for not including anything green in your meal. They didn't have the best beer selection, but they did have two Magic Hat offering on draught. But we are talking about the Midwest here...so I'll let it slide.
While it wasn't the most spectacular hunk of meat I've ever had, it was damn good. If you are after a decent steak in Cleveland and don't want to seem pretentious by going to a Ruth's Chris or something...check out http://www.hydeparkrestaurants.com/
